Reviews For Maxim Magazine

I certainly do hope one of these days that Maxim magazing will get women who are small-breasted equal time.

That's all I have to say.

Now this is one magazine you must avoid at all costs! The title might be confusing but whatever you do, DO NOT SUBSCRIBE TO THAT MAGAZINE! If you want to know in my opinion this is something that should have never existed!

Disclaimer: I do not mean to offend anyone so if you don't agree with my opinion please at least respect mine. I will respect yours.


Beginning of the Story

It was in February of this year or my last year in high school (so sad). I was alone at my family's apartment (and I was 18 at that time) then suddenly my doorbell rang. When I opened it a college student asked me how old I was. When I stated my age (how stupid of me) he said that he was selling subscriptions to various magazines and asked me if I was interested in any. Not being very informed about types of magazines I decided to subscribe to a couple and asked him what girls my age read. He presented me with a list and pointed out that Maxim was one of the popular magazines for my age so I signed up. At that time I only knew the "Teen People" (bad magazine in my opinion and I made a mistake to subscribe to it when I was 13), "Seventeen" (not much better and thank god I never subscribed to it but I've seen it in various places) and "Scientific American" (a pretty good one and my family had subscribed some time ago). Looking back at that evening I should have just said that I was 15 (because for some reason I still look 15-16 even though I'm 19 now) and made him go away.


Don't Judge A Book by its Cover

Well in this case you should judge a book by the cover! Once the first issue arrived and I saw the cover I began to get that feeling but remembering the saying above opened it and looked through it. Let's just say this isn't something for anyone with brains and common sense. If the cover has barely dressed women posing in seductive ways the inside has a TON of similar images and not much else. In my opinion this disgraces both genders equally. It portrays men as snobby group focused mainly on primary instincts (eating, sleeping, fighting and reproducing) and it portrays women as toys for men or may be even worse. The magazine I believe has a few main sections listed below.

Dump Your Girlfriend For Me-some popular half-naked woman lists the reasons why you should forget your girlfriend (I guess the target group is mostly guys) and call her. Talk about unfaithfulness!

Campus/College Hottie/Cutie (title may vary)-a college-aged girl takes some sort of a test and appears in this magazine half-naked

Laugh Stupid-a bunch of strange and less-than-funny jokes. May be some sex-crazed man may find it interesting but as for me...

Other sections may vary and contain opinions by some celebrities regarding girls, guys, that's hot...you get the point. Add a HUGE bunch of advertisements to the whole thing and you'll get the idea of the magazine.


The Choices, the changes...

This magazine can use a huge improvement in its content. How about articles of dangers of sexual behavior and how important it is to be well-informed on that topic? How about articles about someone saving someone and doing something good? How about articles which state opinions of common people not just celebrities? And what's the deal with all these almost-naked women all over the place? And oh yeah why would it be appropriate and not offensive to girls or women? Everyone should have a sense of humor but certain things just can't be funny

After reading the first issue and briefly looking through the second I stopped opening them and just throw them in the trash as they arrive. A few days ago the magazine came marked as the "Last Issue" with offers to renew subscription so I may be finally free from that junk nightmare.

Overall (as I guess you figured out) I am not recommending this thing. The final decision is of course yours to make


"The Choices, the changes..." was taken from the cartoon "Hobbit" that I watched somewhere in March of this year


Recommended:
No

WARNING: I'm reviewing this magazine based strictly on its contents. Part of this review may be vulgar or inappropriate to some readers. Unfortunately, vulgarity and sexually explicit articles are a lot of what this magazine is about. If you'd like a very basic synopsis of my review, please skip to the bottom of the page.

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There she was, Katherine Heigl, scantily clad, staring with seductive, alluring eyes. She was saying, "buy this magazine, buy this magazine, buy this magazine....."

Unfortunately, I did.

Katherine Heigl is one of my favorite young actresses. I think she's a beautiful woman and an incredible talent. When I saw her on the cover of the June issue of Maxim magazine, I thought, "wow, she's not featured very often, I think I'll pick this up". Yeah, the cover sold me. You know the old adage, "don't judge a book by it's cover"? Well, the same holds true for magazines.

I'm not sure exactly what I was hoping for by picking up this magazine, but whatever it was, it certainly didn't happen. I sat down and opened the magazine to see the featured articles. I was amazed, and in a few cases shocked, at what I found. Here are a few of the articles the magazine included:

"Cash Machine, eight rules for getting rich" - Everyone wants to know how to get rich, don't they? I certainly do. Well, now you can! According to this article, all you need to do to become the next millionaire, is to be in the right place at the right time. Everything else will fall into place. Pure, blind luck. Great, I may be one of the most unlucky people on the face of the earth. I guess I'm doomed to a life of mediocrity. Oh well, maybe the next article will be more intellectually stimulating.

"Taboo You! Make your fantasies come true" - Here's a chance to spice up your sex life and find out what your woman really wants. Basically, this article says that women are into bondage, role playing, shaving their pubic hair (I'm sorry, it's what the article says), letting you take pornographic photos of her, making love in public and watching pornos with their men...but will probably not participate in a threesome. And people wonder why our country is so morally corrupt? Why families don't stay together? If young men are reading and believing this garbage, I can certainly understand why values have gone south. And, believe it or not, the worst of this magazine is yet to come.

"Do Unto Others, 50 ways to screw with anyone...Suck more pleasure out of life by screwing with people's heads for no reason." - Do I need to sum this up? I understand this is for entertainment value and supposed to be comical. However, I'm sure there are people out there who have tried some of these out. Many are comical on paper, but in real life, no. I'm sorry, people don't need ideas like this. Really.

Okay, if what was above wasn't bad enough, here's where it gets disgusting. If you have a weak stomach or are easily sickened or enraged by sexual crimes, please don't read this part. Skip to the bottom of the page for my final synopsis. Seriously.

I was absolutely shocked and disgusted when I saw this article. My initial thought was, "why would anyone include this in their magazine"? But what scared me even more than that was the thought, "is this really what people want to read about"?

"House of Horror, The Evil In Elephant Butte...he strapped them to a gurney. He tortured them with electric shock and sex toys. He even videotaped it. Or at least that's what the cops say. Take a peak inside The Toy Box, David Parker Ray's dungeon of horrors." - Unfortunately, this is a true story. It is about a man and his female companion who would kidnap, torture and rape young women. No only was I sickened to even see such a disgusting article, I was absolutely horrified as I read on. There was a complete photographic diagram of the trailer that was used to hold these women against their will. Complete with a numbered key so the reader could examine every aspect of the trailer. What each section was used for along with all the tools of torture. And the article went into detail about things that were done to these women. That's all I'm going to say.

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Now listen...I picked this magazine up at a local grocery store. And it was well within the reach of young children. Honestly, I was shocked. I picked up this magazine because of a beautiful, scantily clad, young woman on the cover. Something that would attract anywhere from a ten year old boy to a seventy year old man. And some females I suppose. But what lay beneath the cover is something that shouldn't even be allowed on magazine racks or newsstands anywhere. At least not within the reach of youngsters.

This magazine was filled with unintelligent, worthless articles of filth and moral corruption. The humor was poor and potentially dangerous. Yes, there were many photos of beautiful young women, practically naked in seductive poses. I suppose that's what most pick up this magazine for.

Personally, I wouldn't recommend this magazine to anyone.






Recommended:
No

For crying out loud, are we men or spineless sheep who blindly follow the wagging of the media dog's tail. This magazine makes me sick, and angry, and really ashamed to be male.

After a moment, the intelligent male should realize, wait a second, this article is called "Hot Love"! What am I doing reading this drivel? I should be out fixing the mustang or playing a pickup game of hockey or something.

Seriously, a friend of mine had a subscription to Maxim, and of course the pretty ladies drew me in; had to take a look (hey, I'm still a big dumb male). But after I read a few articles I actually got angry.

This is a magazine that justifies chauvinism, selfishness, shallowness, and paints the picture that every male needs to be a gadget laden sex craved neanderthal. In other words, it says it's okay to never grow out of the frat boy phase.

The consumerism is so thick you have trouble differentiating the ads from the reviews.

Just like Cosmo, the health advice is the only area that seems to be fairly valid, but unless it's directly related to sex, it doesn't get much space.

Political commentary in the magazine is childish, and the advice on love and sex articles are as laughable as the "how to pick up a stripper" books.

Here's an example of an "advice" article: how to set up a manage trois. The article starts by saying this is the ultimate measure of your sexual prowess. So sex is a competitive event? Oh, I thought it was all about pleasure and love. The article goes on to suggest that you should rent certain movies (they provide a list, including a few foreign films with the footnote of "you'll get extra points because it's foreign" ... hurl) that contain bisexual or lesbian love scenes to breach the subject with your girlfriend. C'mon guys, if you have to go through such measures to talk to your mate, you're in a sad sad place.

Even the sport related articles are shallow minded: what does that basketball player get paid, who does that hockey guy screw, what clothes manufacturer does that footballer prefer?

Bottom line, it's stupid drivel that is only massively popular because our society has created so much stupid drivel that stupid drivel that titilates rises above the mere stupid drivel.

Be a real man and stop reading this shite.


Recommended:
No

I have nothing against magazines that feature photos of beautiful women, scantily clad in provocative poses. In fact I'm in favor of it. Heck, put it up to a vote and I'll vote for it. However, interspersed with those photos the magazine should offer something of interest. Playboy, for instance, is famous for photos of beautiful women as well as amazing fiction, intelligent articles and inciteful interviews.
Maxim could be a good magazine, if there were anything in it worth reading. Unfortunately there isn't. The articles are shallow drivel aimed at vacuous frat boys with no desire to exercise their brains. It is a mix of gossipy talk pieces and dull witted, empty headed articles meant to titilate.
If I want a magazine that is nothing but pictures of women in poses meant to arouse, the selection of pornography available is nearly limitless. If I want something thoughtful to read there are many choices in that area also. If I want both Playboy is on every newstand.
In short, Maxim is good for one thing only: paper training puppies. Then again, the paper is too slick for even that. I guess Maxim is good for nothing at all.


Recommended:
No

I recently was able to read Maxim cover to cover -- and I've also read through 'naughty' (haha) magazines like Penthouse, as well as fashion, beauty, and health mags such as Self, Shape, GQ, Seventeen, Cosmopolitan, Vogue, Allure, etc. As an 'everyday bunny', I'm very, very familiar with magazines, target audiences, advertising, etc.

Maxim is like a PG-13 rated Penthouse meets Mad magazine that sometimes runs into R rated, if you are lucky and a randy guy (or gal) and like that sort of thing. If that's your style, you will like Maxim. Quite a few ladies also read Maxim on a regular basis, there's even a 'letters from the ladies' section in the mag. One lady even posed in her tighty whities (actually, hers were black) and sent in her pic...eek. I guess it's
because they like to see how the 'other half' live and what 'guys like'.

For the love of God ladies, do not read Maxim or Penthouse or Hustler or Playboy to see what "men want". Or what "men want women to be like". Or "how men think". Same goes for men who read women's mags to see "what women want". Or if you read these mags for "research" bulk it up with a healthy dose of context and actual (honest) interaction with the opposite sex and maybe a degree in psychoanalysis to boot. Or else you will be one messed up puppy.

I can only give this mag 1 star. Granted, it has a lot of 'studio-quality' pictures on good quality paper stock. And pages. Lots of pages. Yes, these are the in/famous 'nekkid pictures' that other reviewers have mentioned.

Content wise? Whoo, here we go.

What's up with the soft-porn lay-outs??? And all the quotations (supposedly) by female actresses and models like, "I live to please my man," or "I want my man to make me feel like a woman and a little girl at the same time". Eeuw. Double Eeuw. Scary. How much do these women get paid to say these sort of things?

And the "What Women Secretly Love About You" article in the December issue was SOOOO off. See, these are the kinds of things that make me cringe. Women enjoy watching men sweat? Um...where do these women live??? DO NOT BE FOOLED, MAXIM READERS. WOMEN DO NOT LUST TO SEE YOU GORGE YOURSELVES AT DINNER AND SWEAT. However, a lot of us (especially if we were going out with you) would probably not mention it unless extraordinary circumstances influenced us to do otherwise.

The "jokes" section is similar to the one in Penthouse magazine, lots of bad jokes, usually using women as the butt of the joke. They even had an 'anti-Cathy' cartoon strip bit. What's wrong with Cathy, cup bearer of estrogen for the modern suburban single woman, huh? Huh? Too much woman for ya??

The magazine overall has a feel reminiscent of "The Man Show" reveling in sexism, sloth, junior high humor, and other "manly" (hey, they said it, not me) things to be _funny_ (As opposed to misogynistic. Overt misogyny, like "Why we hate bitches and beat our wives for kicks" probably wouldn't sell in the mainstream, unless accompanied by an airbrushed photo of a 'lesbian dominatrix' and naked pictures of Jennifer Aniston or some other babe of the month -- oh wait, that's already been done). Complete with "serious" articles so you feel like you're learning something other than the newest Lotus position variations. The article on the doomed Russian submarine (with blurbs like, "your own feces floated nearby along with dead bodies" prominently displayed on the page) were placed alongside "The 25 Hottest Sex Scenes" article. Tasteful.

And hand in hand with with off comments about women and sex (i.e. 'sexism') you always get the really ignorant comments about race and nationality (i.e. 'racism' and 'xenophobia'). But, they're meant as jokes so they don't mean anything right? (See me, I'm rolling my eyes)

One reader wrote in a letter with a correction on the preparation of sushi (correcting an earlier article in Maxim). The letter was titled, "Most Honorable Correction" mimicing the kind of Confucius fortune-cookie "Asian speak" that non-Asians ascribe to Asians. Started back in the days when people wrote about 'Japs' and 'Chinks' in newspapers. There was also a cartoon of a bunch of dogs, a la "101 Dalmations", cowering in fear. It was for a piece on Disney rip-offs. So how the heck did more racist commments get in there? Got to hand it to those Maxim folks, they's got skills. The caption underneath the dogs read, "Watch out, it's the Iron Chef!" You know, Iron Chef, the JAPANESE cooking show that's also covered somewhere else on e-opinions (look under Food Network the cable station). Because, Asian people just love dog, didn't you know? That's where the term 'dog-eater' comes from.

One reader was such a die-hard fan of good journalism, nekkid pictures, what have you, that he was going to sneak in a bunch of Maxim into Kuwait, where such material is contraband. (You know Kuwait, right, it's ANOTHER COUNTRY *outside* the UNITED STATES) The editor responded by saying how 'we' should kick Kuwait's ass or let them be ass-whupped by Saddam Hussein or something and teach them a lesson for not allowing in pornograph -- I mean 'free speech'. Why? I'm not sure, I think it had something to do with misguided notions of American superiority and patriotism...of nekkid pictures.

Like in a lot of mags, this lack of self-awareness, the too-comfortable juxtaposition of objectified mostly nekkid women who you are meant to fantasize about sexually next to articles like "how to have an orgy" next to "how to lie (to women)" and endless jokes and comments in varying degrees of anger and hatred about how women suck (shut up, you pervs) and other jokes playing on racial stereotypes and just plain ignorance is just gross, demeaning, and a BIG NO-NO on Mr. Bun Bun's list.

I think it's really sad that a men's magazine has got to be like this to be successful. (Okay, God, you want me to be 'egalitarian', I think it's sad that 'women's magazines' have got to have constantly remind you of how fat, flat-chested, limp-haired, depressed, not-confident enough, man-dependent, and sexually naive you are in order to be successful. Okay, now? I said it.)

But, hey, if ya like gadgets, pictures of Nekkid ladies, and off humor, then Maxim is for you!

-Mr. Bun Bun




Recommended:
No

Once upon a time this was a good magazine worth reading cover to cover. Unfortunately they've slowly been replacing content with more and more advertising. As the magazine currently stands you could probably finish reading the actual "content" in about an hour. The rest is advertising and BS. This magazine jumped the shark a long long time ago. Just let it die already like it's supposed to.

i've bought a few copies of this magazine, but none in over a year. maxim is chock full of repetitive sex stories and media-savvy "babes" that conveniently pose at the same time their new CDs or movies are about to come out. a typical issue is 175 pages of advertising (counting those airbrushed pictorials) and maybe 25 pages of actual content, most of which is either recycled from previous maxims or adapted from other magazines.

i find it hilarious that the same "manly man" guys who make fun of oprah-watching females buy this magazine and claim it the greatest thing on the newsstand, when it's really just the same shallow junk as any housewife-friendly talk show. it's not that i hate this magazine, i just think it's really really lame.

...1) I can't;
2) on second thought, it deserves at least one star for having some silly, funny stuff that you don't find in other magazines.

That said, it is grossly overrated. How is it consistently in the top sellers list? Well, there are as many millions of folks with a below average IQ as there are above average. It's too bad they can't play up the silly humor a bit more while leaving the abhorrent juvenileness out. The images are generally trashy and sometimes airbrushed to the point that it looks fake and ridiculous--they could improve the quality of the photos a LOT.

Admit it, you would probably hide an issue if you ran into anyone you actually respected. Doesn't that say it all? Reconsider the standards you are setting for yourself, and respect your own brain, too.

This magazine is nothing more than Cosmo for men. How to make your sex life better, how to bag the hottest chick, blah blah blah. Face it, if you're looking for a magazine to make your sex life better, it won't work. If you're looking for soft porn, you can download more off the Internet than you'd ever dream about getting in hard print. And outside of soft porn, this magazine has absolutely nothing to it.